How to Determine the Type of Guy You’re Dealing With

Why do we women fall for the guy that is a total jerk, but don’t even consider the guy who will do anything to be around us?! The jerk maybe the best looking guy in the room, but if he is verbally or physically abusive, distant, or worse-cheats, it can really break a girl down!

I’ve met with many different guys through dating apps, sites, offline too and even through not very popular free chat line where you chat with people real time on the phone. So yes, I have a lot of experience. I think that when your dealing with a very good-looking guy, usually they already know that, and most likely they take full advantage of that. I’m sure they have a lot of friends, even more female friends, have been around the block a few times, and get the best of everything. So they get arrogant, and think that because they are blessed with looks or a body, that they don’t need to treat a woman well because she is easily replaceable! You may be physically attracted to them, and fall in love, but they have been conditioned to get pretty much anything they want, and if you can’t do that, well they can find someone who will. Then you have the guy that is not the hottest commodity, but he is still cute in his own way. Aside from having more personality than the good-looking jerk, he will treat you like you deserve. They will listen to you when you talk, offer to pay, they enjoy hanging out with you, and never blow you off on purpose. These guys will make you feel like a princess!

Through trial and error I have experienced both types of guys, and I must say that I am tired of dealing with the “guy that every girl wants, and every guy wants to be” when I can have the guy that treats me like I should be.

Here are some of the types of guys I have come across:

The bad boy

This is the guy that breaks the rules, he may be good looking, and he may not be the best. But he attracts you because he gets your heart racing. You do things you haven’t done before, but be careful that you don’t get roped into doing something you don’t want to. These guys also tend to be manipulative on the verge of forceful.

Mr. Popular

Usually this is going to be the guy that will initially attract physically, then being the skilled “player” he is, reel you in. He, for sure, has other women, so you have to keep in mind that you are not going to be his one and only. These are the men who know that they look good, and use it to their advantage, whether it hurts someone else or not. He is quick to break up in relationships because he knows he has other women lined up to be with him.

BGF

A.k.a. best guy friend. THIS is the guy you want to really look at, why is he your friend? He’s probably nice to you, listens to you, goes places with you and actually enjoys spending time with you. He may or may not be the best looking. Either way, knows that he needs to treat you right or you just wouldn’t hang out with him!! If you have never thought that way of your BGF, now is the time. Could you ever potentially be with him in a relationship, can you imagine it? Do you have any feelings at all for him, or ever wondered about you two being together? Just because he isn’t a model does not mean that you wouldn’t be happy. Love isn’t about looks, its about a connection emotionally.

There are all kinds of different types of guys, but these are the three main ones that I have come across. Just remember to watch what you do with the bad boys, keep Mr. Popular as your booty call, and Take a second look at the guy you always turn to to talk.

It’s all about knowing boundaries and how to counter-act whatever type of guy you get involved with.

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Learning How to Attract Women

It would be a tragic story to hear a thirty-something year old man still believing in Saint Nick and even more tragic if the exact same thirty-something guy thought it immoral for others to prejudge him because of bad breath. Looks and first impressions do matter! And the sooner we accept this rule the way we accept the rule of gravity, then seducing women by bringing women becomes possible.

Sadly there’re many men who live their entire lives struggling with their appearances, and with a type of chronic disheveled look, as if a dark cloud is hanging over their head. They seem to be always struggling with their intimate lives, or simply struggling to find romance. Their gut tells them they may not be attractive to other women, yet lacks any urgency to change their physical appearance, because they hold steadfast to the adolescent belief the world should not judge them based on their physical appearance, while always seeming shocked at the notion they may be wrong despite the billion-dollar fashion business, the heartthrob movie kingdom, and the literary genre of romance where the wavy-hair-hunk and his white horse orders about half of the market share of fiction. The purpose here’s looks do matter! People do judge others based on their appearances, and it’s big business, evolving big money ensuring others continue to do so.

Unless your mom gave birth to a completely enlighten narcissist, it takes time for most of us to become aware, or accept, the Darwinian world of looking good to draw women. We must never forget humankind also inherits the phenomenon of courting and competing for a mate along with other critters occupying the animal kingdom; such as the glorious array of colors seen fanned out in male peacock’s feathers, the male antelope arching their necks high to display their horns, the desperate sounding little bird yodeling off high-pitch vowels to get a piece of ass.

Of course character, intelligence, and a person’s moral character are also huge factors when trying to seduce women, but remember girls are seduced in as much they let themselves be seduced.

The point here is, don’t let your first impression be your last one due to an unruly nose hair.

It’s just too easy to sit back in your chair with a forty-inch waist and your uncombed hair, smirking like the wise-old-owl bathing in your body odor thinking the world is a shallow place, and how everyone should look past your yellow teeth to admit how incredible you really are.

So no more excuses bro, visit the gym!

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How Ex Become Friends After Divorce and Separation

To a lot of individuals, separation and divorce has the negative connotations of ex-couples losing complete interest in one another and never crossing paths again. It’s a fact that some ex-couples oftentimes move to different cities and start new families by remarrying and having offspring.

Amazingly in different cases, evaluations of times can bring divorced and separated couples into closer friendships, especially when the ex-couples have kids together, are single, and reside in the same town. Usually in these examples, the source of separation and divorce were because of minor differences as opposed to abuse or betrayal. Examples of these life-changing events which bring these ex-couples together consist of young children or grandchildren, difficult financial circumstances, and illnesses.

Amidst the stereotypical divorced and separated couples whose young children or grandparents see them one at a time though visitations, some divorced and separated couples let their offspring to see them together on a range of occasions. Specifically, they might have dinner together during weekends and vacations and go to ball or plays games together.

Difficult Economic Situations

In some instances, when divorced and separated couples haven’t remarried, they might live together briefly to reduce expenses. Particularly during tough financial times, ex-couples may face problems of debt or layoffs that place them in a bind. A strong friendship causes among those ex-couples to want to be on the lookout for another until another gets back on their feet.

Illnesses

This may be mortifying for another ex-spouse who doesn’t need anything awful to happen to another especially when they have kids together. The bond could be so powerful that ex-spouses are known to return into the picture concerning seeing the ailing ex-spouses to keep them firm, bring them food, or care for them if they’re disabled. A prime example is the case of a couple who divorced after 14 years of marriage because of the husband’s busy work schedule inconsistent with the couple’s quality time together, placing a strain on their marriage. After both ex-couples remarried, those unions also stopped. When she informed her ex-husband of her identification, he took on the role of being her main caregiver bringing them to return in union, which has lasted a total of 28 years. This illustrates the time is the best healer and how friendships can last forever.

The fundamental idea is that life-changing events can lead divorced and separated couples to return as close friends as well as spouses based on the extremity of their separation. The experiences gained while apart make a new perspective on life that’s beneficial in assisting the ex-couples to get along better. Interestingly, if an ex-spouse remarried and it didn’t work out, the ex-spouse may understand that their first spouse wasn’t so bad. Ex-couples might even realize that it might have never been intended for them to be spouses but instead to be buddies. Everything boils down to the strong force of friendship in reuniting divorced and separated couples with time and through life-changing events.

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Do You Feel Secure With the Man You Live With?

I lived with a man for almost three years without the benefit of marriage. With what result? I can honestly say that, emotionally and psychologically, they were the worst three decades of my life.

We went into our connection with the identical idea that most men and women appear to have now, which is, ‘Once bitten, twice shy,’ too, ‘You do not understand a person until you’ve lived with him.’ So if things did not work out, I felt it would be easier to break the connection than to go through divorce courts.

Insecurity Causes Problems

But it’s those thoughts that cause problems. How do you feel safe never knowing if the other person will still be with you this time next year, or another month?

A de facto relationship has such a temporary sound to it. There’s always the fear that someone else will come along and the connection can just as easily be shifted to this one.

Other Problems

Yes, there is always tension. You can’t ever relax, because you’re always on guard against doing or saying something which may drive the other person away. And anxiety is felt, because an argument will almost always end with one of you using emotional blackmail and saying, ‘I’m leaving.’

That expression de facto was my biggest problem. I would desperately need to explain I was not really an immoral person, that I wasn’t the kind who flitted from man to man. But, clearly, I was immoral, whether it was only with a single man or with a few, and my conscience gave me quite a struggle.

The psychological problems started also. They were shown in depression, feelings of unworthiness and, finally, of self-destruction. Even now, five years after this relationship ended, I feel so ashamed and unclean that I wish to blank out the memories of my mind forever. But I can not, because, as the Creator says, ‘we reap what we sow.’ I have a daily reminder in the form of my little boy who was the consequence of that previous union.

I believed that I could protect both him and my two kids from my first marriage against any bias. On the surface it seems as if I have been married twice. But it only serves to make me feel dishonest every time I am called by that name.

In Retrospect

Looking back, I realize that I did much more than damage my own standing. I put my three children in a position that left them open to attack by other kids at school, all due to the morals of their mother, that, of course, they could not deny. It must have made them ashamed too.

 

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